Darrens party was ok.
I feel bad and confused and nervous and i wish i could kill my brain so it couldn't think for itself. just leave my heart so i could still love and feel emotions and care about other people and what they want. I want my brain gone so i cant have my own opinions. they are usually stupid and selfish and bad and i dont even care about them that much. i want others to be happy more than what i want.
I keep rereading the 6 1/2 pages in my hand. I usually just reread one or 2 certain paragraphs. my head hurts and i cant think.
i feel dead to everything except claire. Its somewhat annoying. I wish i had other things just so i could take my mind off of everything for a while. i think it would help me refocus
sigh
out
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1 comment:
youre not dead to meeee :D just depressed at times *which youre not suuposed to be! -.-"
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